Thursday, June 20, 2013

Apparently I'm a b*tch?

Interesting topic Katie! Unfortunately this is the week of ALL THE THINGS (and furthermore all the things blowing up in my face :-/ ) so I don't have much time to go on at length (be glad - the list of things I'm insecure/don't like about myself is MILES long).

One thing I would really like to be different that has been on my mind lately is my interpersonal skills - specifically those that are used when meeting someone else. I am terrible at meeting people. Most of the time I just feel incredibly awkward. The few times I think it does go well, I generally find out later that it... well, didn't. I can't tell you the number of times I've thought I was getting along really well with someone and then a few weeks later they'll say something like "You know, you're a lot better than I thought! When we first met I thought you were a total b*tch!" Most of the time I just laugh it off, but inside it really bothers me - what is it I'm doing that make people think that? I always think we're just having fun, and usually I've loosened up enough that I'm letting them see something more like the "real" me. And yet for some reason it's worse that way than when I'm just the shy girl sitting in the corner (which happens more often than I'd like to admit).

Anyway, I'm trying to be more friendly, and just in general a happier person - hopefully that will mean I can meet some awesome new friends come fall!

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